20 Years Ago

It still feels like yesterday.

There are so many thoughts racing through my mind; so many emotions flooding through me: great sadness, anger, confusion, fear, empathy, sympathy, and so many more. I think the initial feeling on the day of the 911 attack was nothing more than pure shock. But now, after 20 years of remembering, and hearing stories from the people who survived either the attack itself, or the loss of friends and loved ones in the attack, the emotion is even higher.

Sept. 11, 2001. I was at work, listening to the radio. The news broke in and said a plane hit one of the World Trade Center towers in NYC. What?!?! I ran into our break room, where a dozen other people were already watching the TV news. We all thought it was an accident - the plane's controls were not working, or the pilot passed out, or died. Then the news camera moved to show another plane heading for the second tower. At that moment I knew there was something terribly wrong happening right before our eyes. My heart sank and I went numb when the plane hit the second tower. What the hell was happening?? As the events unfolded and the death toll rose, everything seemed so surreal. In the days that followed the disbelief and shock of what happened finally began to sink in. How could this be happening HERE?? I don't typically watch the news, but I watched the coverage on TV with horror. I felt so terrible for those who died, but even more so for those who lost loved ones in such a terrible act. I think there were a lot of us wandering around at the time, feeling very lost, confused, shocked, and afraid of how far this was going to go. This past week I've been watching documentaries on PBS about 911, and while the replays of the events are still horrible to watch, the interviews with people who experienced it first hand are so interesting. Their strength and insight, along with their tenacity to get past what they had been through, just amaze me. The one that really hit me was a gentleman who was a fire chief, and was dispatched to ground zero with his crew. Imagine the thoughts that went through him when he sent his crew into one of the towers to try and evacuate and rescue people who were trapped inside. Among his crew was his younger brother, who was killed when the tower collapsed. On the one hand, the entire crew, including his brother, had a job to do - it's what they are trained for. But wow, when it's a brother... I cannot even imagine the terror, guilt, sadness, or any other emotions he might have felt when he watched that tower fall with his brother inside. There are probably so many more back stories like this one that we may never know. We NEED to know their stories, and to always remember one of the worst tragedies in our country's history. May we never forget.